Where I am and Where I want to Be.

No matter how well I think that I am doing with all of my classes at WestConn, and no matter how much I think that I have here in CT to stick around for, there is always part of me that wants to pack up my shit and move to Bar Harbor, Maine. There is a school up there, College of the Atlantic, that is the perfect school for someone like me. So perfect that I keep their brochure in my apartment on a table, and flip through it from time to time, looking at what I am missing. At COA they offer a Bachelor of Arts in Human Ecology as their sole major. That sounds strange, I know, but I would be able to design my own cirriculum, as long as I take the required ecology and earth science credits. That means that I can build up my own self-designed degree by taking psychology, philosophy, literature, art, and music courses. Their learning environment is an actual environment: an island surrounded by wildlife, natural bodies of water, and natural forests.
Why did I not go there for school, even though I applied? It costs 35,000 a year. And that is money that I just don't have and money that I will not just be able to pay off in student loans and financial aid.
Part of me will always want to go somewhere other than where I am, just pack up and leave everything behind. I know that I will, despite any financial or personal restraints, because it is in my nature to do what is best for me. I don't know what's going to happen to me. I just hope that whatever it is will happen soon. I need to high-tail it the fuck out of Danbury and out of Connecticut.

Needs to be Said.

In my travels I have begun to notice that intelligent human interest in the unknown is deteriorating, and it is very heartbreaking to see people not using their minds for what they are designed to do: analyze, introspect, observe, calculate. The intellectual fiber of humanity is being shredded by those who choose not to do these thing; those who are giving up or losing the contemplative nature of the human mind. We need that connection, that intellectual spark, to function. A non-functioning mind is dead.
I am seeing less and less original and creative thought as I travel along my current town of residence.
The moral fabric of our society is also slowly being shrinkwrapped in generalities and courteous favors. Humans are becoming afraid to be honest with one another. We call this political correctness, but what it is really doing is dumbing down our own nature to be critical of one another. If you do not like someone, do not be afraid to tell that person. Be open and honest and specific. I'm not saying that hate is right. I'm saying that anger and discontentment are healthy and necessary to our intellectual, spiritual, and emotional growth as human beings.